{A Really Weird Tuesday}

this tuesday just feels wonky.
it's the 100th day of school which to a kindergartener, is a big deal and the day will be filled with all kinds of 5 year old fun...so aubrey is staying full day.
sniff sniff.

...she wanted a picture of her fancy pony...and see that homemade 100 day necklace...

remember she is the only k'er that is half day in a school of over 250...and i am way more then fine with that. we make the most of our time together and this is it for us folks...the big bad first grade (just kidding ya know...i heart first grade!) starts next year and we have no options then...but she does stay all day for extra special days and today is one of them.

so, on tuesdays i usually scoop aubrey up then go pick up riley for lunch. today it was just riley and i. which let me tell you, was so delightful and awesome...we chatted uninterrupted, browsed through the lands end kids catalog, watched a family of deer run through the snow at our favorite park and really, really talked and i loved every minute of it....but there was no aubrey.

forgive my crazy hair

then after the long, lonely car ride home i came in to a very quiet house. no little 5 year old running around asking for playdoh or paint or popsicles.
it's just me.
and it's so darn quiet.
eerie even.

so, i'm sitting here thinking of what next year will feel like.
if i'm not subbing (or don't have a full time job...don't even get me started there...talk about WONKY!!!) this is what my afternoons will look like! eeeeekkkkkk

so this is my plan.
vacuum and mop.
listen to one of my fav songs ever a few more 100 times.
do my borrowed buddies workout dvd.
try not to faint.

then go pick up my baby.
i swear i'm gonna be first in the parent pick-up line!!
her in my lap is the only way this wonky day can be normal again!:)

have a happy,

cindy

{TBA}

yep.
it happened to us again.
most of you probably won't remember this post, but we've been down this road before.

the email came through on my phone at 2:53 that class lists were posted and we had our shoes on and were out the door in about 4 minutes.

as we were leaving in an excited flurry...janey said, "mom, remember just like you told me...it's already done...the sign is already hanging...all we need to do is read it."  then she prayed..."Lord let this teacher be the perfect match for aubrey." wow. i guess sometimes they do listen and remember. and wow. maybe i should practice what i preach a bit better!

as i came up from behind all i heard riley say was "aubrey you have ava in your class!!!" (the one girl from our small town that went to her preschool in the nearby city) then i saw the big girls faces as they watched me read the sign that said...new teacher...tba. then they kept looking at me for a response...and followed it up with "mom are you ok?" in that split second i knew they were watching me and waiting for my reaction. i hid it well. for aubrey. and just smiled and called her the mystery surprise teacher and focused on the friend. but i have to admit that as aubrey scurried away to look for the playground, my eyes welled up with tears.

all i could think of was "why".
why after the letter i wrote about her sensitivities and her shy nature would they pick her to be in the new teacher's class.
why with her peanut allergy that requires a special pre-school meeting with the teacher and nurse would they pick her to be in the new teacher's class?
why with us being 1 of  maybe 5 families out of 250 still opting for the half day program would they pick her to be in the new teacher's class?
why?

but i guess as janey reminded me, we don't always know why and we just have to have faith.
after many supportive words and a good nights sleep, we are good. it is what it is and we will make the best of it. and we will continue to pray for the perfect teacher for aubrey.

so...teacher's name tba.

but smiley, awesome, amazing, giggly, loved like crazy, melt your heart kindergartner we know for sure!

cindy

{I Feel It}

this easy breezy summer feeling is coming to an end.
this is our last full week of summer.
our
last
full
week
of
summer!
eeeeekkkkkkkk!

the girls are starting to think of classes and friends and teachers and i've even caught them walking around with new backpacks on for practice. (and not just aubrey)

wait!
stop!!

i'm not done yet.
we need to go more places
and do more things.

we need to practice math facts more.
write in our journals more.
read together more.

we need to sleep in till 9+ with no worries. (them not me!)
and skip lunch for popcorn, a movie and smoothies without a second thought.

so this morning we made a list.
a few last minute summer fun things we are hoping to do together.

cause i feel it.
and it doesn't make me happy!

have a "get it all in cause it's almost over" kind of day...

cindy

{Something New}

new car seat time!
yep...big girl beds...big girl car seats...and kindergarten...who approved all this?!?!:)
ha

she was really getting snug in her old one (that used to be jane's) so we decided this was the perfect time with all our summer road trips on the horizon.

farewell old car seat!
we enjoyed many a good year with you!!

of course just like with a new car...the cup holders are the best part!!:)

have a happy day,

cindy

{Goodbye Crib}

this day.

oh this day. 

knew it would eventually come, put it off for sooooo long.

we bumped into that crib daily as we tried to get into her closet and did the nightly "no let's sleep in your big girls bed tonight" dance for so long. 

just wasn't ready i guess. 

either of us really. 

but here we are. 

and it feels just fine.

for both of us.

flashback to a sweltering august day  (can i please...just for an hour at least! and yes it's been THAT long!) when the new bedding arrived...

forgive the blurry iphone shots, but as you can tell...we were a wee bit overjoyed!:) and i couldn't leave any of them out...too sweet!:)

a princess in blue on a birdy covered bed.

sweetness overload.

fast forward back to the present.

(well actually a few months ago...but let's not get picky shall we?)

sisters there for moral support of course.

helping with all the little putting away details

 last time climbing in...

...and last time staring up at me with those beautiful green eyes.

cue the tears

leave it to janey to  rustle up a make-shift crib out on the landing for one last snuggle. she would sleep there too if we let her!:)

a beautiful big girls room...

...for a beautiful almost big girl!

{Flashbacks and Flashforwards}

our desktop slide show is a mix of favorite old photos that just fade in and out all day. i love that. and i love seeing what photo will greet me each morning when i turn on the computer.

this is what i saw today....my sweet dad and the girls.

this was our old house. we didn't have a finished basement then so we turned the little eat in nook into a make shift playroom. i love looking at the old toys. we still have most of them. if aubrey was with us then, that would have been the most perfect time...all of us home...no school yet!!!:)

here are a few other shots from that visit.

my dad's a chocolate milk shake kind of guy!:)

oh those sandbox days.

*******************************************

tonight is kindergarten round up for aubrey.
yep.
tonight.
an evening where we hear about all the procedures and things we can do to get out little ones ready for the transition. i know this should be an exciting time. and i guess in some teeny tiny way it is. i know she will love it. i know she will have fun, learn a lot and make friends. and grow and blossom and all that. but i still can't help but think of it as a sort of ending not really a beginning. an ending to this time before school and all it's massiveness. the massiveness that will take over her life. swallow up all our time and leave us with only the scraps at the end of the day. (how's that for mama drama!!:))

i am blessed that our school still offers a half day program. (at least i pray they do....i will find out more tonight!) the half day kindergarten program was one of the reasons we moved here in the first place. riley is a june birthday and she had such a hard time at preschool, we really thought this would be a better transition for her. we fell in love with the program and it was just perfect for our family. home by lunch for snuggles, downtime, dancing in the living room...oh... and time with mommy! heaven!

last year they decided to go full day. i know it is a Godsend for many families that send their children to day care or extended care so that both mom and dad can work. i get that. i really do.
they still offered the half day program this year but only 8 families participated. eight.
eight!!

really that kind of blows me away. so many families i thought for sure would be on board for the half day option sent their children anyway. i can't help but think that the pressures of making sure their children were "keeping up" with all the other full day kinders played a major part in that decision. that makes me sad really. they have a lifetime of school ahead of them. a lifetime. and time at home before school begins is so fleeting and in my opinion grossly under valued.

but ok...enough of the soap box speech!:) i could go on and on and on and on about that topic!!!:)

so back to tonight...i will sit there and listen quietly for the mention of half day. and be prepared to jump up and demand it if it's not mentioned. (i would so embarrass the pants off riley if she was sitting there with me!!:)) wish me luck!

have a happy day,

(and keep those babies home!!:))

cindy